30 days submission - Day 6

What do you feel are the roots of your submission? Do you think it has something to do with childhood? Is it a relationship management tool as in the practice of domestic discipline? Is it a sexual thrill or something else?

I am not entirely sure where my submissive side comes from. I doubt very much it is rooted in my childhood as when I think back there is no positive memories when I was around dominant men.

The first time I noticed an affiliation with wanting to me submissive was when I was watching a porno with my ex. The woman was taking 2 guys at once and one of them grabbed her by the throat as he was fucking her. I was in the doggy position and that instantly made me cum. In another scene, where one guy was fucking her ass wide as the other was down by her head forcing her to suck his cock and then pulled out and pushed her face down, pinning her as she stared to fight against the ass fucking. Boom! I came again so hard that my tightened pussy pushed him out and he came all over the bed. He was irritated but I was fascinated.

It became a permanent part of my fantasies, having my partner use me like a slut but when I asked him to play along during our sex life, he was firm on not wanting to. The very idea seemed to be repulsive to him so instead we just stuck with our kinda boring sex life. I feel bad that I just gave up on something that I really wanted to try but it was a no go for him, so it made it a no go for me.

Now I am in a relationship which started based on BDSM, I get to explore all kinds of naughty things. I can be free to be myself and I can ask Daddy things without any judgement. Even if he’s not into it, that’s OK as there is plenty more that we can do.

For me submission is both a sexual thrill and a way of life.

I feel a rush being used by daddy, having him cuff me to the bed and use his holes any way be likes, but I get a completely different rush when he gives me orders, “like come lie into me” when he wants cuddles or how he calls me his beautiful baby girl and gives me kisses. I like that in my submission I can be both his whore and his baby girl. I can be his princess and his slut, and I like that. It gives me the release I need.

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