30 days submission - Day 27

Do you have submissive desires or fantasies that you have yet to be able to explore? Do some of your desires confuse or frighten you? Do they excite you?

TW – Consensual non consent, rape

Oooh now that’s a telling question.

Ok so yes, I do have a few fantasies relating to being submissive.

The one I have had the longest I guess could be under the heading of submission as its CNC. Meaning Daddy would really have to force me into submission. I know this is not for everyone and I am aware there are people who think this is a horrifying fantasy – my ex went mental when I got up the courage to confide in him and it took me a while to tell Daddy about it as I know it’s a bit oft but the massive difference is the consensual part. 

It is all pre discussed and I am comfortable with Daddy that I trust him to stop if I need to. For me, its about being forced into submitting to him, rather than wanting to be hurt or attacked. I does confuse me a little as to why I would want to partake in CNC given my history but it’s what I fantasise about. It doesn’t scare me though as it’s not something I would do out with a loving relationship with someone I could really trust. It is definitely exciting to think about, especially when Daddy and I have a play session and he gets rough and forces me down or pins me. It sets me on fire when we play like that, but I’ve never been brave enough to 'fight' back. It’s purely a fantasy though as we haven’t discussed it since we first did and it’s not something I think could be done any time soon anyway.

A desire I have is to be collared and owned fully and officially by Daddy. There is just something about it. I don’t know why as it’s not like having a collar would make him be here more which I want so bad, but I do feel like it’s a symbol of his ownership and my submission to him. After a discussion with him however, I know that’s not going to happen so it’s something that I just have to dream about. It’s not a big issue I guess as I gave up on the idea of ever getting married before (which is kind of similar to being collared for me) so its just another thing to add to the cupboard in the back of my mind. I don’t mind compromising though as I point blank refuse to give him up.


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