Dating as a single parent


Dating as a single parent is hard ... long distance dating sucks ... So trying to make both work is a minefield.

Sometimes you just have to roll with the punches though, especially if you have found someone that is worth it.

I'm a very different kinda girl to be in a relationship with anyway. I spent years getting shit for being "girly" so it's not something I do often. And when I'm with my guy I'm quite laid back. I don't see the point in being angry at my partner for no reason like some of my girl friends. If I have a problem with my man, I will tell him and try to work towards fixing it and moving on.

I also don't have anything that can be considered "special birthday sex". I don't understand when male friends of mine say how excited they are for a "birthday blowjob". What even is that? Oral in a party hat? Do they get sucked off while eating cake? Nah, for me oral sex isn't a treat or a reward for good behaviour. I'm happy to suck the soul out of my man just cause it's a Tuesday. And I'm so kinky that if he has an idea I'm all for it, not "maybe for your birthday". That's just weird to me. Sex is to be enjoyed, not traded like a sticky commodity. 

This does tend to lend itself to me being easy going when it comes to going out on dates. In fact some of the most awesome dates I've been on have been very low key.

  • Chatting over coffee, then going for a walk and him stealing a kiss.
  • Going for ice cream on a warm summer night and eating it while watching the sun set at the beach.
  • Having my dinner made for me and then cuddling up on the sofa watching a horror movie.
  • Being treated to dinner at a favourite restaurant and then going to a movie.
They might not be the most imaginative of dates but I appreciate someone wanting to spend the time with me and make memories together.

I also appreciate when they understand that being a single mum makes dating harder. I'm glad I have found someone that understands how important to me my child is, and who doesn't make me feel shitty that I can't just drop everything and run off for a weekend. I need to have advanced notice for most things which can be frustrating for some guys.

Adding in the D/s can make it a little more tricky too.

I was a very disobedient baby girl and Daddy most definitely needs to punish me. Bit it's not easy finding the time to do so. I started to feel frustrated by it and when I talked to Daddy he was feeling pissed off about it too. He actually started to feel like a bad daddy which blew my mind - he's absolutely perfect for me - but the reason he put off punishment was cause he wanted to discipline me properly, but couldn't cause the teen is here. Not once did it dawn in him to ask me to get a sitter for the night. He didn't wanna make the teen have to leave his own house. So he put his needs as a man, as a Dom and as a partner second to my kid. I had so many arguments with my ex over that very issue and my kid called him "dad".

Yet here is a guy who makes the effort to be with me and when he's here, takes an interest in the teen, asking how school has been. At first i thought that was just for my benefit, but now i think he actually cares and wants to know, rather than just score points for me.

Even though I feel like I don't get enough time with Daddy, I do appreciate the time I get. He works like an animal so the fact that he will do a full shift then drive down to me to deal with my crazy life means the world to me. He fits into our weird little world and he is happy enough to have dinner with us and then wait till we can be alone.

Yeah I might not get to go out on dates with Daddy or spend as much time with him as I want, but there is nothing that would make me give him up, just cause I hate the distance. We have already spoke about how we both want that to change and that one day it will so I'll hold on to that. Knowing one day that it's gonna be goodnight instead of goodbye.

I've found someone who is understanding of my crazy mind, who doesn't judge me and the Teens weird ways and who loves me unconditionally. 

That's not something I'm ever gonna give up without a fight. And I fight dirty!



F4Thought

4 comments

  1. This is a lovely read, I think someone showing a genuine interest in your child is such a huge indicator that they are a keeper :) and I am in awe of folks who make long distance work, I am incredibly lucky that my boyfriend is close by, but even then we sometimes feel like there aren't enough days in the week for us to find time together. I hope both of you can enjoy some quality time together soon x

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    1. We talk a lot about our "One day" when its goodnight rather than goodbye - i cant wait. Its hard but we both want this to work so i think we can do it. And i agree, its a huge plus on his part xx

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  2. I am so with u on that "blow job" stuff - it is part of me and my man's sex life on a rolling basis. Nice post
    May x

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    1. EXACTLY! I'm restricted just now due to a wisdom tooth causing havoc and i actually miss sucking his cock. I LOVE LOVE LOVE when i make him moan with my mouth and it turns me on so much xx

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