I had a really good day today. Surprisingly it was relatively pain free so I’m not too annoyed that tonight pain has crept up on me and I’m not able to sleep.

Instead, I’m thinking about daddy and how much I miss him. It's hard to believe that we've almost been together two years. To be fair, this last year hasn’t really felt like it counted what with the pandemic keeping us apart in all but still come November he will have been mine and I will have been his for two years.

Traditionally, the 2nd anniversary gift should be something cotton and although that’s predominantly used for wedding anniversaries there’s no hard and fast rule to say it can't just be a regular/dating anniversary too. When I think cotton, I think clothing, more specifically underwear, so I’m toying with the idea of creating a boudoir shoot especially for him.

How I’m going to go about doing it however as a whole other issue. How can someone make themselves look sexy on camera via a timer and more importantly will I be able to feel sexy since I’m plus size? Now don’t for a second think I’m saying plus size women can’t be sexy. I follow many gorgeous plus size women on Twitter and Instagram who I openly have huge crushes on. But me, myself, in my own skin? There is no way I can compete with that level of beauty.

Daddy on the other hand will completely disagree. He thinks I’m sexy all the time and he says he prefers his women with a bit more meat on the bone so really I know the issue is in my head. Its MY hang up that I need to get over.

I have always been good with the camera and taking pictures of other people so it will be a bit of a weird stance being in front of the camera. I could hopefully Photoshop away a few imperfections without him noticing should I need to but the biggest issue I’m thinking (other than the self loathing) is the setting.

I’ve been looking tonight at nice hotels that I could book simply for the purpose of taking photos but then that would involve lugging a lot of stuff about to the likes of Glasgow and that just feels a little bit excessive. I could always go classy black and white shots against a white backdrop. That could be do-able within my house. Plus, I could fuck about in Photoshop and add pops of colour in the photos to break it up a bit.

I have so many ideas floating about my head tonight but I’m pretty sure its something he will like and I would do anything to make him happy. And it’s a unique gift too, I’ve never done a boudoir shoot before.

Now to look for some flattering poses. If any plus size peeps want to fling some ideas my way I’m all ears.