Here's to 2022 - Fingers crossed

2021 was a cluster fuck – which unfortunately didn’t see me getting sexually fucked as much as I wanted. 

Twice. I had sex twice. 

And as a woman who not only enjoys sex but needs it to function, its safe to say it wasn’t even remotely enough. I get frustrated when I don't get that particular need met, which then turns into a depressive state - not ideal when you suffer from depression to begin with. It quickly starts to spiral.

Even seeing Daddy was a non-starter. I was only able to be with him 3 times physically and towards the end of the year the video chats stopped, and the phone calls slowed right down too. Honestly there have been times where I've been terrified that my relationship had all but ended and even now, I’m still worried, but I’ve got to take Daddy on his word that we are ok, and wait for him to come out of this shitty spell he’s stuck in.

Which is what I’m hoping will happen in 2022. I want to get back to how we were before lockdown and covid. Where we were close, and I felt connected to him. I miss him and I miss us. 

Ideally, I want to get my submissive side back too but that’s not gonna happen if we don’t get back to where we were first. As much as I can bang my head against the wall trying to make us better, it’s not just me that needs to put the work in, and since I can't help him with his work/life balance, I just need to be patient. 

I fucking hate that word btw, “patience” – that was my word for 2021 and it came back to bite me on the ass, so it can really fuck off now!

So back to 2022 – and my word of the year, “progress”

This year I’m going to focus on keeping going. I want to kick start my life again as I’m not happy how it stalled last year. I’ve set myself naughty some goals which hopefully over 2022 I’ll achieve, and they are all things I can do solo while I wait for Daddy to catch up.
  • Get back into blogging. It was therapeutic and gave me a way to look at my kinky side out with being in the bedroom with Daddy.
  • Finding my sex drive again. I lost it somewhere around October and even masturbating has become problematic. I want that back. I miss cumming.
  • Love myself again. Living with chronic pain has given me this wave of self-loathing. Mentally and physically. I hate how I feel about myself and I need to change it. I want to get back to a place where I can love myself. I want to love my curves and feel sexy again – rather than this horrible swamp troll that I currently loath.
  • Make some new NON-judgmental kinky friends. I feel very alone these days and I don’t really feel like I have anyone that I can talk to about kink without judgment or general dumb fuckery. It would be nice if I could discuss the pros and cons to fisting or DP without having to deal with the “ew”, “that’s just weird” or any other negative reaction. I’m not a fan of kink shaming.
  • And lastly, I wanna explore my kinks more. Granted this one is largely dependent on Daddy as I’m in a monogamous relationship and have zero interest in straying but there are some kinks that I can perhaps explore solo, time will tell, I guess.

Wicked Wednesday


  1. I'm sorry to hear 2021 has been such a shitty year for you! I love your sexy goals for 2022 and look forward to reading more about them during the year. Here's to getting back to cumming and kink! Happy New Year!
    ~ Marie xox

  2. Chronic pain is a difficult thing to navigate. I hope you are able to find some ways to feel better -- and to feel better about yourself! -- in the coming year.

  3. Hey great to see you - i know u had a painful year - I remember our interaction on 4 thoughts and twitter. I really hope 2022 is better

    Take care xx